Open Mic Jitters

(ctt)-- note (ctt) means clearing of the throat.

(ctt) "Make new friends but keep the old, one is silver and the other is gold. A circle is round but never ends, that's how long you should keep your friends"

Lol I had to take it back to Girl Scouts with that song. And it's very appropriate, seeing as how this blog is mostly about my editor. I was a girl scout back in the day, made it to Juniors and then I stopped. I remember in Brownies (wow that almost 20 yrs ago) we would end each meeting with the "Make new friends" song.

My editor has been my friend for as long as I can remember. We grew up together in the same neighborhood and have been friends for-ev-er. We used to go to Girl Scouts together and she is currently an assistant troop leader (sorry if I have the title wrong Tan!)

We talk everyday and this morning she suggested that I go to the Up&Up open mic with her tomorrow. I've been meaning to go for the longest and decided hey why not, especially since I have Wednesday off. Lol well come to find out, I don't have this Wednesday off for Veteran's Day (so glad my coworker let me know!) but that is neither here nor there.

In the midst of our random conversation, she and another friend of hers suggested that I read a portion of my book at open mic night. I instantly got NERVOUS and excited. I've been on this whole kick of I need to get over my stage fright these last few months. I'm gonna be a rockstar one day and I have to not be nervous singing and reading in front of folks. Lol I try to sing in the Metro and in front of friends but I still get the jitters.

What's crazy is that I get ridiculously nervous but I always get it together and sound on point once I'm in front of people. Case in point, I delivered a bangin (if I do say so myself) speech at one of my best friend's wedding back in June. I was so freakin nervous but I got up there and killed it.

Hopefully I will be able to do the same tomorrow night. Lol I told Tan I will be at the bar getting comfy with my liquid courage until she arrives.

She is truly the best and I love her so much!

Inspired & Having a Moment

Listening to Donnie McClurkin's Stand. Having a serious moment at my desk at work. Makes me think about everything I've been through, everything my parents are going through. Sometimes I feel like I'm not going to be able to do this. I feel so overwhelmed with publishing and all of my other projects...man he's hitting the praaayed you cried part... prayed and cried you prayed and cried. prayed and cried.

Whooooo man...I'm so grateful for all of my blessings. All I do is visualize the day when I go to the printer and pick up my first run of published books. I'm going to have a serious breakdown. A year ago this time, I didn't even know... now I'm about to be self published author. I'm finally going to be able to take care of my parents. I refuse to watch them struggle.

I'm gonna change the world. God already has it in the plans. Watch.

The Foreign Exchange Concert and Chaundon

Ohhhhmiiggiiyaaahd it was so dope. I sung my heart out, almost passed out from the heat and wasn't a puss for once and passed out samples of my book. I met one of the nicest people ever, Chaundon: check out his blog and his latest album. He is so dope and encouraged me like nobodys business.

I'm grinding like shit. Self-publishing is no joke. I thank God so much for my talent and I'm not complaining at all. I will work my fingers to the bone for this. I've already been on my eff sleep shit for the past 4 months. I will rest when I am FOCC.

I'm still sad about my godbrother. Man, mourning is hard but I know he's smiling and so proud of me. Trying to get it together and finish a few projects but it is hard to write comedic shit when you're sad as hell (sighs galore).

On a brighter note, I kicked it with my mom and dad this weekend and that was the most uplifting ish ever. My parents are so supportive. My dad can't wait to start slingin books on the streets (lol his words, that man is comedy). I showed my mom some of the things I had to compile and she was shocked that it was so involved. She can't wait to get her hustle on too. I love them :)

The Foreign Exchange, There Will Be Blood, Radiohead

First of all, The Foreign Exchange is coming to DC next Sunday and I just copped my tics. I am very pressed and hype (I just said the same thing on my personal facebook page and my fan facebook page). They are the effin bomb.com and I can't wait to see them let Phonte serenade me. I hope he hits my fav jam , and this one too , and I hope he and Yazarah hit another fav which happens to be a Stevie Wonder original .

Anyways, I had to drive to work today and was brainstorming per usual. I thought about the movie There Will Be Blood. I just saw it for the first time last weekend and I fell in love with Daniel Day Lewis all over again. He has had classic roles in some of my favorite movies: The Crucible ("I have given you my soul, leave me my name!") and The Last of The Mohicans. He was effffffffing incredible and the movie was so...man I'm at a loss for words. I loved it and I'm going to watch it again tonight. I like period pieces and I admire DDL because he's a method actor. FYI, a method actor is someone who completely takes on the character during filming. You have to refer to him as the character during the entire production process and you don't get to speak with "Daniel" until production has wrapped. That shit is tight as hell.

The music was on point too. I did some research and come to find out, Jonny Greenwood composed the score for There Will Be Blood. Jonny Greenwood is a member of Radiohead, one of the tightest bands ever in life.

All of this thinking in the car made me turn on my sole Radiohead album, OK Computer ,and blast Paranoid Android. The beat on this song is so vicious. I've really been on beats for the last few months. I am going to learn how to produce my own music and put out an album next year. In a few years I want to turn my book into a movie. I've already started the screenplay. I just have to go to film school so I can direct my own shit. People laugh when I say I'm gonna be on Tyler Perry status but I'm so serious. God blessed me with the most ridiculous talent ever and I'm not gonna limit myself. I was talking to someone yesterday and he said that as adults we need to go back to the kid mentality. When you were a kid, you tried whatever, didn't give an eff if you failed. As adults, we can be so stuck in our ways. Not me :) I am on kindergarten status from now on.

"So Now I Gotta Go and Do It EXTRA HARD" Metro Chronicles Part 1 of (fill in the blank)

Today's post refers to one of my favorite Little Brother Jams, Extra Hard (I am looking for the youtube version as I type this, imeem didn't have it and I can't upload it right now)

So today I started passing out samples of my book on the train. Lol I only passed out 4. Yep, Ms. Social Butterfly who stays screaming "I'm gonna hustle my shit so hard on the train" got nervous as hell and clammed up. I know why I did but it's still funny to me because I am such a social person.

Like really, I am the one who will sit and converse with a complete stranger for an hour like we're old friends. When I go out, I'm always the one who approaches whoever and will randomly talk to bartenders, bouncers, sexy men ;), etc.

My novel is something different though. I totally believe that my novel is off the chain and so many of my friends have already said the same (lol they have also given the "i promise I'm not saying this because I'm you friend" preface). I just get so nervous and am just afraid that people won't like it. I'm getting over it though. I'm gonna listen to that Little Brother track this afternoon when I get off and pass my sample out like crazy on the yellow and blue lines. I feel like I need to pass out 100 copies a day.

R.I.P. Morrie

I am beyond depressed. My godbrother Morris Smalls III "Morrie" passed away on Saturday. He had been battling cancer for a while. I can't believe he's gone. I miss him so much. He was such a funny, sweet person and he was so smart. We used to joke each other all the time about the Real HU (he graduated from Hampton and I graduated from Howard). His favorite movie was School of Rock and he loved Family Guy.

I credit him with my nickname K.Reid. He was the first person to start calling me by that name and for a while, he was the only one I allowed to call me that name. When I decided I was going to venture out and become an artist, I thought about potential stage names for the longest and one day Morrie's voice popped into my head. I loved when he called me K.Reid. Made me sound so cool...

He was only 34. I know it's God's will and I'm glad he's not suffering anymore but I miss him so much. I can't stop crying. I just wish he was here. He was so young and so full of life. I can't even write anymore.

Printer Specs

Not too much to say today. I'm busy planning Transcend.'s first party scheduled for this Saturday 10/3. I'm in serious overdrive mode, trying my hardest to make sure we only have to pick up the tables and chairs on Saturday. Everything else will be done before then. I'm seriously thinking about taking up painting as a habit. I was spray painting some stuff for the party last Sunday and I swear it was the most theraputic shit ever in life.

I'm supposed to speak with a printer today so I can get pricing info. I'm so blessed to have the tightest typesetter ever in life. She just took the form from me and said she would handle finding the information for me. She has a good friend who will hook me up with more info. Man, the biggest shoutout to God right now. He stays opening all types of doors and windows for me.

I'm in such a blah mood. Maybe I'll feel like writing more after this party...

Song of the day is Maxwell's Bad Habits. I can't wait to see him live one of these days. I just don't have the funds to make that dream a reality just yet. Please buy my book guys. I am trying to be a recession survivor, not a casualty...