"I'm on my grind, all the time"

So this morning I was on the train reading a "Start Your Own Self-Publishing Business" book and listening to my iPod on random. First, the book is off the chain. I'm nervous about the self-publishing experience but I have complete faith that everything is going to work out, especially since I have a book chock full of self-publishing tips and a grip of friends that are down for my cause. Second, my iPod is my boo and I love how the random feature will find all types of songs I've forgotten about.

As I swiped my fare card at the terminal, one of my Rick Ross (Rawse) classics, "On My Grind" blared through my earphones.
  

"On My Grind" used to get constant play about a year ago when I was "on my grind" trying to find a new job. Now it has a totally different meaning as I am "on my grind" as a first time author and self-publisher. I walked up the street towards my job, and thought about Ricky Rawse and how that song and how his experiences as a former C.O. turned rapper parallel my experiences as a corporate girl turned artist/entrepreneur.

I used to hate on Rawse for being a former C.O., not because he was a C.O. (i think that is an admirable, thankless job) but because he lied about it. It's not just Rawse though, on principle it bothers me that damn near every rapper is a former/fake "hustler." I know the labels like that shit and it pays the bills to talk about drugs but as Phote says, "there's gotta be more to this generation than drinkin and smokin all they weed up"

However, when I think about it, Rick Ross and I aren't so different. We're both "on our grind all the time." We both saw an opportunity and seized it. When I first decided to write my book, people asked "oh are you gonna do an urban fiction or erotica?" I was taken aback but when I thought about it, that's the main avenue for most young black writers.

I decided to take the road less traveled and do a horror story set in the suburbs. Why? Because 1. I'm suburban like shiiii. I don't know anything about hustlin on the block and 2. I LOVE horror films. Am I a punk and hide my face in my date's arm at the movies? Lol yes but I still love the suspense and gore. I'm always amazed what constitutes as a Rated R movie theses days. I know when I was younger, freakin Hostel 2 and The Last House on the Left would've been considered NC-17. But, the ratings system and what our kids view on basic cable these days is another story (better yet thesis) for another day.

Rick Ross decided to bank on an option that has worked for years: rap lyrics about hustling+bling+hot ass beats= $$$... hey man I can't hate on that one. Gangsta rap does pay the freakin bills. You may not agree with the message but you cannot knock the hustle.

• Should Rick Ross write positive lyrics and beat it with his constant mantra of "I'm so great cause I (used to) sell drugs? Maybe.
• Does he have the right to rap about whatever is on his mind? Absolutely.

 The same thoughts came to mind when I decided to write a horror.

• Should I write something uplifting and positive sans graphic violence? Maybe.
• Should I write whatever the eff I want to write and make it entertaining as hell? Absolutely.

That's the point though, it's entertainment. People who take this stuff literally need to pop a Valium and chill out. If your kids take it literally then as a parent, you need to be smacked for letting your kid listen to/watch/read matter that is too mature for their young eyes. I have a strong feeling that people will blast my book for it's violence and gore but I really don't give an eff. I'm following my dream and I don't have time to worry about what people think. There is so much more to my book than the horror aspect and I hope people will realize this long after I publish.

That's all for now. I was a little long winded with this one but it's my first blog :)

~K.Reid