"There's no crying in baseball..."

I wish Tom Hanks would come thru and deliver that classic line and ammend it to "There's no crying in self-publishing."

The last few weeks I've been crying tears of joy but over this last week, anxiety has reared her ugly head and decided to get nice and cozy. I've been trying to brush it off like and act like I'm cool but I'm really not. I got sick as hell this morning and was heaving all over the place. Sidenote: I almost wish I was preggers so the throwing up would make sense.

Then later today, I had to go to the bathroom so I could cry. I had a nice long conversation with myself and God and I'm working it out. My nerves are just getting the best of me. There's is no reason for me to be upset. I'm about to self publish my first book and that is a blessing. I have been so strong this year and so committed and I believed and claimed it all year, so why the nerves now?

I'm not worried about being a success. That is out of my hands and I'm not trippin off of it forreal. My editor and I were talking about J.K. Rowling and the Harry Potter series earlier. I told her that I'm not even trying to be mega successful like her $$ wise. I just want to create an experience for people like she did with Harry Potter. I just want people to read my book and identify with it. She believes I will be a worldwide success and I claimed it with her for a few minutes. Man I love her so much.

I am not going to be sad today. I claim it. I am speaking my happiness into existence. I am going to go home, work on this cartoon and watch the second season of The Boondocks and laugh until my sides hurt :)